6 years

Today marks six years since I said goodbye to my mom. Six years since she lost her battle with breast cancer. Today I woke up with a heavy heart and lump in my throat. I don't really know what to write about it... I just wanted to acknowledge it and remember, as I do everyday, what a wonderful mom she was to Jana and I. My dad stopped on his way home from work last night and left three roses at her "little piece of real estate," as we call it. He takes three roses out there often, one Jana for me and one for him. Six years ago we vowed to be the "three muskateers" and always take care of each other. So there are roses for Barb from her Three Muskateers.
But today, to get through the day, I will try to remember good and fun memories. Like the time she came to Lawrence to visit me and we had a girls-weekend in Kansas City. We had reservations for a regular room at Crown Center. But somehow, she and I sweet-talked the front desk guy and were upgraded to one of the two largest suites on the top floor. So we quickly unpacked, put on our swimsuits and headed to the pool to drink margaritas and sun ourselves. I am very much like my mom in this way. She loved soaking in the rays and feeling (her words) "like a lizard on a hot rock." I couldn't have said it better myself. So after plenty of time in the sun, we returned to the room and got dress up in our cutest dresses and our most fabulous shoes and went out for the evening. We stayed in the Crown Center area yet visited several restaurants and bars. We had martinis and beef carpacchio at Pierponts in Union Station and then continued around the area, stopping for a cocktail and an appetizer everywhere we went. We finished the evening on top of Crown Center at Skye's. It is an awesome revolving restaurant. We ordered champagne and two desserts and sat in velvet club chairs and watched the revolving skyline of Kansas City. It was a perfect night with my mom.
So I am going to do my best to avoid tears today and think of all the fun moments we had together. Vacations to Beaver Lake... quiet evenings with popcorn and movie... the sheep in the backyard... rescuing Gonzo (our pidgeon)... giggling when we could get her on the trampoline ... Delbert McClinton concerts... I could go on for hours.

I found this poem this morning, and it seemed just perfect.

As I look back on my life
I find myself wondering.....
Did I remember to thank you
for all that you have done for me?
For all of the times you were by my side
to help me celebrate my successes
and accept my defeats?
Or for teaching me the value of hard work,
good judgement, courage, and honesty?
I wonder if I've ever thanked you for the simple things...
The laughter, smiles, and quiet times we've shared?
If I have forgotten to express my gratitude
For any of these things,
I am thanking you now....
and I am hoping that you've known all along,
how very much you are loved and appreciated.
--Unknown


If you are reading this, and thinking of Barb, and feeling like sharing a happy story... well go right ahead. Just click on "comments" at the bottom of this post and share a story. Or, if you would rather, you are welcome to send it in an email to me. I love the fun and funny stories about Barb.
She was awesome and I miss her so much.

How's the house?

Thanks to everyone who read the first entry of my blog. And also, thanks to everyone who emailed. I realized that between having two babies, moving to a new city, buying a house, etc... lots of important people in our lives have NO idea what is going on with the Tovars.

The biggest question has been, "What's happening with the renovations to the house?"
Great question!

Jason and I bought our new-to-us house in June of 2008. It is a solid ranch-style house built in 1971. It is the perfect size for our family of four... but definitely needed some renovation. So before moving in we:

• installed a new staircase to the basement (there was no staircase inside the house, just via the garage)
• tore down the wall between the living room and dining room
• took down wallpaper in every room upstairs and painted all the walls
• recarpeted the entire basement and the living room, dining room, hallways and bedrooms upstairs
• tiled the kitchen, entry and two upstairs bathrooms

And then we were finally able to move in! Of course, the renovations didn't stop there... but the house was livable. Since then we have been unpacking, creating fun bedrooms for the boys, and renovating the kitchen. We have moved the laundry room from off-the-kitchen to the basement. And now we are making the old laundry closet into a space for our new double oven (god bless Craigslist) and a coffee bar.

It's always a little chaotic at our house, but we wouldn't have it any other way. We are hoping to have the major projects finished by the holidays.

So... that's the scoop on the Tovar house.

Halloween is this week so I will have pics of Grey and Miles to post soon. Jana and Ryan and I took the boys to a elementary school fall festival on Friday night. Grey was dressed as a bat and Miles was a super cute cow. At first Grey was a little overwhelmed with all the people, but once he realized there was free candy he was happy. (Yes, I am a pretty "crunchy" mama. Grey doesn't really get candy... ever. He does get to have ice cream with Grandpa Doug, but that is the extent of his encounter with sweets. So you can understand why he was so impressed to eat several twix bars and some M&Ms.) But his favorite part of the evening was the hayrack ride. He really didn't care about the ride, just the opportunity to get a close look at the tractor. He looked like a crazed Beatles fan as he stood at the chain-link fence as the tractor went by, screaming at the top of his lungs, "Truckie! TRUCKIE!!!"

Sunday night we went to our first event with the playdate group I joined online. It was fun to meet so many other parents of young children. I think 75% or more of the families there had at least two kids under the age of 4. Grey was not in a great mood because he missed his afternoon nap. But he did enjoy the trick-or-treating part of the evening, he loved the homemade cookies and he likes holding his jack-o-lantern bucket.

Jason and I were laughing that 10 years ago I remember dressing as Baby Spice of the Spice Girls and entering some crazy costume contest at America's Pub. Now our lives are a little bit different. hahaha! This Friday we are both taking the day off work to take the boys around to see all our friends and family. So this weekend I will have pictures of the lil' Bat and the lil' Wizard.

Thanks to Courtney

I have to say, Courtney inspired me. My friend Courtney had a beautiful baby boy in September and she has already done a fantastic job of documenting his life through a blog. What a great idea! (Courtney - lil' warning to you. You are making the rest of us look bad! Just kidding!)

And quite honestly... I have felt like a total slacker when it comes to baby books for Grey and Miles. It is not their fault that their first years of life happen to be when their parents moved across the state, took new jobs and bought and renovated a house. So, I am admitting it... I have not maintained the baby books as a good mom should. Well... all that is going to change!

This is my answer to the baby book issue. I can document on here and then have some great reminders and stories to put in the baby books. And I love that I can share their lives and my life with friends and family across the country.

So, that is all for now. I hope to update this at least weekly. Thanks for stopping by and I promise to post some pics later this week.

For now, I will leave you with a pic from a few months ago (it is the most recent I have on my work computer) of Miles and Grey hanging out on Grandpa's couch.

I am one lucky mama.